Go Ahead Take A Bite

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Menopause Is So Not For Sissies!

It's been so long, I truly can't remember the source of this pic. 

Yep. I'm going there. I hope the title or content of this post doesn't offend anyone and if it does I'm truly sorry, but I am in no mood to grovel. To be honest, I haven't got the energy (or frankly the desire) to brush my damn teeth some days. I know... That's totally gross. But if it makes you feel any better, I do gargle with a bottle glass or two of Pinot on those days.

Between the hot flashes and the chills I never know what to wear, so I layer. A gorgeous ensemble of PJ pants, over-sized T-shirts and hoodies is pretty much my uniform when I'm lounging around at church home. I'm so tempted to take a page from those young kids (and some sketchy adults?) and flat out wear them to the grocery store. Or, maybe to Walmart.


I find myself having what I believe to be intelligent conversations with people and  right in mid sentence, the half-heimers kicks in. I'll completely forget words that I've been saying since I was 2.  I'm talkin' easy words, like "the" "yes" and "repertoire".  I also forget who people are.  It's pretty sad when your 27 year old daughter calls, says "Hi Mommy" and you say, "Hi! uhh... who is this?"  Forgetting who people are does have it's advantages, though. My sex life has never been so diverse and exciting! (I'm just kidding, honey. I almost always know it's you. ...ahem)

Menopause or as I like to call it, mental-pause, can last for as few as 2 or 3 years or up to a decade or two. Let's do the math, shall we?  (I'm not making that up. Betty White said so... in her memoirs ~ or was it Nancy Reagan?) I just turned 50 and I've been told by my GYN that I've probably been in "peri"menopause (that's a medical term for stark raving bwitch in training) for about 5 years. Gee! That only leaves, maybe, a decade to go? UGH! Somebody euthanize me now, please!

I suppose that's enough griping for one post, so I'll say fhejqchh, owo;uc, s-o l-o-n-g for now.  Been nice visiting with you! Come back soon to read my next post! ... if I remember how to do it.

I'm participating in the new "Linky Followers" Hop! (it's a new tool for following that could very well be the perfect replacement for the soon to depart GFC - just my opinion)

Click HERE to link up or to find out more!


  1. Loved the video! And I do wonder if menopause isn't striking me down early. That pari crap... of course it is tough to tell with the migraines because they attack the memory centers, too. Once I get this migraine thing licked, menopause is right around the corner. It isn't one damn thing after another. It is one damn thing over and over. LOL. It is hard being a woman!!!!

  2. Dear heavens...could I please hug you? You just described my life to a T!!

    Following you through the LF blog hop. I think that's 3 different ways I'm following you now. Face it...you are just stuck with me! ;)

  3. I wanted you to know I am following your new LINKY FOLLOWER tool. I hope you will come over and follow me as well.

    Cheri from Its So Very Cheri

  4. Is this what I have to look forward to?! Glad to have found you thru Cheri's blog hop! New Linky Follower - hope you can pop on over soon!

  5. New follower from LF Party Hop. I would love for you to stop by my page at http://grandmasamazingjourney.blogspot.com and follow as well.

  6. Found you via the Linky Blog Hop. Following you now! Hope you can come visit me at http://www.eccentricleopard.com

  7. Robin: I wouldn't doubt that the peri has something to do with the migraines. Not that I think it's the sole cause... just something that could certainly exacerbate the whole thing. My GYN diagnosed mine as hormonal migraines due to meno several years ago. Hope you're hangin' in there. Hugs

    Tanya: If I'm stuck with you then it's happily so! Thanks so much for the follow(s)! Isn't it grand being a "middle aged" woman?? LOL

    Cheri: Thanks for following and thanks for hosting the great hop! I'm so glad you did. It's a great tool and the word needs to get out there.

    Kelly: I think you've got a while before it hits! LOL Thanks so much for the follow. I popped right over and followed back!

    Predictable Me: Happy to do it! Thanks for following me!

    Tera: Thanks for following. I'm more than happy to follow you back!

  8. Ha! You're hilarious! Thank goodness I'm past all that due to a hysterectomy in my 30's. Those hot flashes took me out- horrible!!!
    Glad to have found you thru the LF blog hop-
    hope you'll stop by soon.

  9. Tina: Sorry you had to go through that so young. My sister-in-law had a partial in her early 30's (they left the ovaries) and she's still having most of the symptoms at 50! Thanks for stopping by and for following through LF!

  10. Found you via the Linky hop and have become your newest follower. I hope you have a chance to visit and perhaps follow me back.

  11. All I have to do is take one look at my mom and...yikes! I've got so much fun stuff to look forward too ;)

  12. Hilarious! Found you through the LF blog hop...I'm your newest follower! Would love it if you came by and followed me back!

  13. THANK YOU THANK YOU I so enjoyed your post. I haven't laugh that hard in a long time.I am now following you on Linky.I would love it if you followed me back. I really enjoy meeting new Bloggers.

  14. Just stopping by from the Linky Party Blog Hop. I hope you will visit and follow back.

  15. I'm a follower from the Linky Follower Blog hop! I hope you'll follow me back!

  16. Ha, LOVED this post...I'm right there with ya! I'm a new Linky Follower (from the blog LF hop) and I'd love it if you would visit my blog, http://intheoldroad.blogspot.com

  17. OMGosh, I love your sense of humor.
    New follower via the Linky Party Hop.
    I hope you will stop by my blog, say hello and follow me back!

  18. Hi there Mary,
    Loved your blog, it's right up my alley!
    And to quote the famous Sweet Potato Queens of Mississippi "Menopause makes you crazy, and crazy costs a lot of money"!
    Keep the fans and ice water close,
    ~~from me and Wilma~~

  19. Spit out my drink!!! This is HILARIOUS!! Following via linky!! Please come follow me!! ;)

  20. Wow...You are amazing! I found you on the linky blog hop and am your newest follower! I hope you have an amazing week!


  21. Just bounced over from http://michelleslittlepieceofheaven.blogspot.com/ and I am finding that you and I must be linked in some way because your blog sounds a lot like me! LOL That video is a scream! Thanks for the laugh!

  22. hang in there... memopause will end one day!! i promise. And try Reiki healing + aromatherapy + crystal therapy as your tools in the battle. Harmless and helpful!

    I'm actually hopping over from the LINKY FOLLOWERS blog hop. I'm following you. Will you follow me back???!


    Happy Valentines Day!


Spill your heart out!