Menopause Is So Not For Sissies!

It's been so long, I truly can't remember the source of this pic. 

Yep. I'm going there. I hope the title or content of this post doesn't offend anyone and if it does I'm truly sorry, but I am in no mood to grovel. To be honest, I haven't got the energy (or frankly the desire) to brush my damn teeth some days. I know... That's totally gross. But if it makes you feel any better, I do gargle with a bottle glass or two of Pinot on those days.

Between the hot flashes and the chills I never know what to wear, so I layer. A gorgeous ensemble of PJ pants, over-sized T-shirts and hoodies is pretty much my uniform when I'm lounging around at church home. I'm so tempted to take a page from those young kids (and some sketchy adults?) and flat out wear them to the grocery store. Or, maybe to Walmart.

Source

I find myself having what I believe to be intelligent conversations with people and  right in mid sentence, the half-heimers kicks in. I'll completely forget words that I've been saying since I was 2.  I'm talkin' easy words, like "the" "yes" and "repertoire".  I also forget who people are.  It's pretty sad when your 27 year old daughter calls, says "Hi Mommy" and you say, "Hi! uhh... who is this?"  Forgetting who people are does have it's advantages, though. My sex life has never been so diverse and exciting! (I'm just kidding, honey. I almost always know it's you. ...ahem)

Menopause or as I like to call it, mental-pause, can last for as few as 2 or 3 years or up to a decade or two. Let's do the math, shall we?  (I'm not making that up. Betty White said so... in her memoirs ~ or was it Nancy Reagan?) I just turned 50 and I've been told by my GYN that I've probably been in "peri"menopause (that's a medical term for stark raving bwitch in training) for about 5 years. Gee! That only leaves, maybe, a decade to go? UGH! Somebody euthanize me now, please!

I suppose that's enough griping for one post, so I'll say fhejqchh, owo;uc, s-o l-o-n-g for now.  Been nice visiting with you! Come back soon to read my next post! ... if I remember how to do it.

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